Cultural Differences and Immigration

We are all “los inmigrantes” , and the soul is The First Immigrant: The Soul cannot be held back by any imaginary boundary drawn against it; not by mountain ranges, not by rivers, nor by human scorn.
The Soul goes everywhere, like an old woman in her right mind, going anywhere she wishes, saying whatever she wants, bending to mend whatever is within her reach. Wherever the Soul migrates, it brings blessed and often desperately needed new life.

CPE

I shall begin by saying that everybody that is involved with the immigration phenomenon -detractors and defenders, victims and offenders, and everybody that might be interested in learning about the problems we are facing regarding immigration must be aware that what is visible to the eye is just the tip of the iceberg. In order to address the problems as humanely as possible we have the responsibility to learn as much as we can about them.



Even though countries like the USA or Spain might say that because undocumented people are illegally that humanitarian attitudes can be taken off of the table, I would argue that such countries should instead be teaching every enforcement officer that the undocumented are vulnerable human beings who are in the country for a number of reasons. Almost none of them come with the plan of committing a crime.



Detractors of illegal immigration assert that these people are stealing jobs to which Americans have the right. Defenders tell us that those are jobs that the majority of Americans refuse to do. In my opinion, neither of them are completely right. The educational level of the majority of Americans who refuse to do these kinds of jobs for the minimum wage is significantly higher than the level of education the majority of immigrants have. It is thus understandable that they do not want to perform these jobs. They have aspirations that are higher.

I do believe that the country of origin of the undocumented is primarily responsible for the social problems that have created illegal immigration. One of the responsibilities of any country is to provide education and health to its citizens and they should strive as well to create a healthy economic environment for its own nationals. That does not, however, mean that countries that struggle with illegal immigration can simply refuse to try to find productive solutions.

I will take some of your time to talk specifically about some cases with which I have been involved that demonstrate that enforcement authorities are not ALWAYS taking into consideration either cultural differences nor the basic needs of human beings when trying to resolve cases in which immigrants are involved.

One of them is the enforcement of the law that logically applies to American citizens who have been educated all their lives under certain beliefs, patterns and criteria specially in the enforcement of the law in civil cases . For example what is called_”UNION DE HECHO” (marital Union) in my country. The marital union between a young woman -a minor of 14, 15, or 16 years of age-and an adult male.(19, 20, 21 etc) whether it is an immoral thing or not, is a common practice among Latin American people especially among indigenous people And there’s a reason for this- it is common that women are expected to leave the paternal home in order to release their families of some financial burden to a family that it is already extremely poor, they are expected to provide help to the "husband" through delivering new members to the family to help in the fields at very young ages since theirs is an agricultural dependent economy. .Also the life expectancy of people there is much less than what it is here; so it is not only expected but also well seen that young women begin marital life at early ages

I repeat, many of those parameters or ways of living should be changed SPECIALLY in behalf of women, but as any cultural change it will take decades and we cannot or should not expect to make said change within a single generation which is used to it.



This was the case of A who got "married" with a 15 year old, he was 21, the parents in Guatemala gave their consent, they procreate a child, when the mother took the baby to the doctor the doctor called DFCS and the family was separated, the baby and the mother taken away from the father and he was charged with statutory rape. Fortunately, the judge considered custom (one of the principles of international law) and ruled on his behalf, the couple got married and they were reunited. But this was an exception, since the majority of times these men are sentenced to 30 years. SO for an action that would never be considered a crime in their country of origin, men might serve half of their lives in prison

Or the case of B who might be charged with Death Penalty for –allegedly- having killed her baby after she delivered it in an emergency room bathroom after waiting hours to be treated for the abdominal pain that brought her to the hospital in the first place. To believe that she didn’t know she was pregnant is impossible for any western well educated woman, yet such ignorance is possible

AGAIN there’s no excuse nor justification for actions like this, IT IS still a crime but at the same time, this person is going to receive the full force of the law when her education, her contact with the world and any information in regards to what life is, birth control, what an abortion is etc was never at her disposal. Yet she is being judged without taking said facts as mitigating circumstances, when they are. Culturally we are the product of what we have lived, been taught, etc…so enforcement officers should never disregard the differences that has to do with culture specially when there’s a clash of two or maybe three different cultures and the gaps that do exist in the education of the persons involved should not be disregarded

On one hand one has the laws, cultural environment, the expected behavior in a country that is dealing with the illegal unwanted immigrant population and what it is expected IMMEDIATELY from them even though they don't have any idea of what they might be violating, and on the other hand one has the immigrant population striving to succeed and assimilate in a culture that is extremely different from theirs at a pace that in the majority of cases is impossible to follow

Language, beliefs, lack of opportunities, cultural differences are only some of the factors that will be ignored when evaluating the actions of the undocumented population. But then again how could that be taken into account if enforcement officers have not been properly educated (trained, prepared)?

The separation of families that involved children born as American Citizens is another occurrence that happens every day, that should be avoid and which clearly shows that in some instances there might be a tangible disrespect from the authorities or a tremendous ignorance in regards to the basic rights any person should have not withstanding his/ her immigration status,



As an example I would like to cite the case of C whose children were taken away because they were badly nourished and sick but also -basically- because the parents were ignorant, poor, and undocumented, and I’m citing some of the repost I have had at sight regarding this case His intentions to be the father his children deserved according to his own natural feelings and his efforts to comply with whichever task or requirements were imposed upon him were never taken in to consideration and these parents of 5 impaired children were separated from the children they love , forced to spend money they didn’t have in lawyers who didn’t excel in their job, and to take many trips to the consulate -4 hours away- and up to this date almost two years afterwards they have not been able to reunite with their family; the children are still sick because the disease was a genetic disease that is very difficult to overcome or cure Today the children are living separated from their family in foster homes that no matter how good they are, are not their real family. The parents are struggling with judges trials, depos etc trying to understand why their children are not allowed to live with them and it is highly probable that their parentals rights will soon be terminated..but based on what?



Should we not help these people rather than separate them?

The question here is: are we all doing our best efforts to keep families together, to respect human beings no matter where they come from and to address difficult matters such as illegal immigration in a way that will always take into account that we are dealing with human beings that are vulnerable and, in the majority of cases, eager to learn, improve, work and assimilate. And what are the implications for the future if we continue to separate families? For example, could we be helping in the long run the persistence of gangs by not keeping families together?


If we determine that the undocumented must be returned to their country of origin, then I still say that we should elevate our voice, and point out injustices and violations of human rights. I’m not talking about constitutional rights for those who are not entitled to them, but simply the right to be treated as humans beings. People who are only striving for a better life. Each of us may have different views of the many problems that illegal immigration raises, but each of us, as privileged citizens, should strive to act with respect for our fellow human fellows who in the end have only sought a better life for themselves and their families – who strive for the dream that is uniquely American, the American Dream.

B Illescas
Kennesaw Seminar on immigration
Octobre 2008

Contribution

"And they're off - it's Dutchboy jumping out to an early lead, followed by Nameless and Ex-Fiance into the first turn. Ex-Husband never even got out of the gate and is going back to the stable. Dutchboy continues to turn it on - wait a minute! Dutchboy's thrown a shoe and has stopped! Dutchboy has stopped! Now, it's Psycho battling it out with Ex-Fiance, and here comes Little Red! Little Red's coming on strong! Psycho drops back, and it's Little Red and Ex-Fiance! Little Red's neck and neck with Ex-Fiance, who's still holding on! Little Red may have more energy - he's prancing like a thoroughbred! Ex-Fiance's still hanging in! Dutchboy is back in the race! Dutchboy is back in the race! He's coming up on the outside! Little Red looks worried! Ex-Fiance and Little Red are coming around the last turn! Dutchboy's making his move! It's Little Red by a nose! Little Red by a nose! Dutchboy's catching up. He's past Ex-Fiance! There's a hundred meters left, and Dutchboy may run out of time! Little Red and Dutchboy! Little Red and Dutchboy! Dutchboy's digging deep! Where does he get the energy?! Dutchboy's ahead! He's pulling ahead! There's no photo finish here, folks. It's Dutchboy crossing the line a full length ahead. Dutchboy to win; Little Red to place; and Ex-Fiance to show!"

KB

Im sorry

"The Passionate Seeker to Chance"

Like Poe, she buried her heart.

Her smile was the same.

Her laugh was the same.

Her life was the same.

Until he whispered “Te amo,” “Te amo,” and “Te amo”

at a surprising moment.

And she knew she’d never have peace again

with the pounding under the floorboards.

KB

"Daphnes Reply to the Seeker"

The pounding must be just an echo

and as an echo it is not real

a flat line had been pronounced

her mind just shut the final door

decided to have some peace

and chose the shadows and the quiet dawns

BI

"The Seeker Reply to the Nymph"

Sweet Nymph,

You are no ancient laurel tree; you’ve veins of deep desire.

Though weather-hardened you may be, survived the storms and fire,

Yet like the growth in early spring, true love may bloom anew,

Each blossom bears a solemn oath: a love that beckons you.

KB

CLOSING ARGUMENT

"To the winer, because if there is a loser, there must be then a winer"

March 2008

"Honorable Members of the Jury

It seems that many centuries ago, there was a person inside of me that believed that love existed and that it was precisely love what moved the world

I have chosen to play this role here, not knowing yet how they will call me inside this court, yet, I do believe I have the right to be standing right in front of you because nobody will know the facts about what has been endured here better than the accused and the accuser

Im here to apologize for having wasted your time so terribly by believing what I used to believe and for thinking -for a brief moment-that I could reach you by showing you -with actions and not only with words -that love, commitment and devotion might still exist in this world; by thinking too, that in spite of having made mistakes and in spite of having already lived, man has always had the right for believe that something better may be coming into his life, and more over , the right to begin again and again whatever he may dream of, for life is short and its end might be just around the corner; and finally, for believing that, in spite of the many flaws man can have, when the main ingredient is securely based between two people, nothing should go wrong and the best of chances should be given to them. So- having that into account-, there cannot be a better defense for the defendant than the words spoken by the defendant herself

I came here to apologize because that was once not only expected from me, but also stupidly requested to me in an absurd call that killed any hope I could have had in the past which I know now that it was there only as a result of traces of some unnecessary naivety that was the product of my being sometimes, still young at heart; so, I then, - not even sure up to this point for which I should apologize- indeed state for the record, that Im truly sorry for having believed once that I could teach some values and some understanding to a soul that was already wasted -at least regarding this case - due to the worst type of selfishness . Nevertheless, it is still my hope that seasons and maturity will provide said soul with the understanding and caring that people near it rightly deserve. Specially for its own benefit

It has been said that hope never dies, but oh it does indeed! But only after suffering a horrible agony might it be left to die slowly but definitely; and when this happens, it takes with it your very own life

And although here the death of hope is nothing but collateral damage, I might expect you to still be able to see how criminal that can be in a world where -precisely due to the loss of hope- people choose to merely exist instead of live and where feelings are maybe seen as something silly, stupid and diminished in some instances- and for sure in some others-, as a nuisance or as an impediment to get what you want.

Ladies of this jury: I present to you the world where we live…

The sorrow I feel for the losses I have had can never be eased by any joy that might come to this life again; yet, the instinct for survival is deep within myself because I still have to be strong for those who once-out of respect and compassion- gave this a chance- . But please but do not get mistaken by seeing me walking and talking and still trying to convey into words the death of a soul, for indeed, Im lost for the rest of my life

The prosecution has stated that what happened here was my sole responsibility. I accept that that might be true; but at the end, that comes to be irrelevant; the murderes were two, life imprisonment might be served by two desperate souls, even if only one is condemned … and it is clear that there is one corpse left and said corpse is filling the air that they breath with the stench of betrayal .

Nevertheless, if I am the sole responsible here, be sure Im serving my time harshly; yet, there is much more to be seen than what is visible to the simple eye

So again, honorable members of this jury, the soft yet powerful line overused by many, can be rightly use here:- "He ran into my knife... he ran into my knife ten times"
And, although there is no clear indication of who the murdered is and who the killer was, in my defense I will quote again what was said in those scenes: -" Well, I was in such a state of shock; I completely blacked out, I can't remember a thing. It wasn't until later, when I was washing the blood off my hands, (viciously) I even knew they (we) were dead."-

Yes, we, the interested parties herein, were given something unique that has been waste and consequently lost; something that in very few occasions people are bestow with. So I ask, NOT you members of this jury, but the world out there:

Should those people be judged in the same manner and by the same yardstick than those who never came even close to have what they had?

Should empty words and unfulfilled promises heard and believed by someone who was already hurt and vulnerable should be considered as mitigating circumstances for murder?

Should lies and fallacies should be accepted as palliatives for truth when truth was at the reach of the hand?

Should malice and manipulation can be ever forgiven without feeling desperate knowing that love and hope had been sacrificed for no reason?

Should compassion and understanding be given to murders and wasters when theres only one chance to do things right, thus not doing so, we condemn life itself?

Should quitting could ever be accepted as the proper thing to do when there was still a spark of caring?

The answer would be no, no, and no, as you may already know; at least, for these eyes and for this mind

The accused fought to achieve what was expected.

For what can be considered as a lifetime, and for what should be considered as a proof of commitment and loyalty, she gave what was requested, believed in what was described to her and hoped with wonder for a new beginning for the last time in her life; and although failing seems to have been a constant in the prosecutor's deeds through his entire life, this time there was someone who really believed in him

Can something else might be considered more despicable?

And indeed although he might state that there is no one else and that still, it is always she , the only one, time will prove that that is correct only when there is no flesh involved.

So honorable members of this jury, what goes around, comes around, and although that is not my wish but just a fact , here in this court, there's nothing to rule anymore, there's nothing to save anymore, there's nothing to condemn anymore, because everything is already lost, and what could have been once would never ever be. So after all, what remains to be said is that it is only injustice, it is only malice, it is only selfishness and vanity, and it is only waste what -here- have been served

And with that, ladies of the jury, I rest my case

Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

(Macbeth)

"

Lyrics | Amanda Marshall - I’ll Be Okay lyrics

As Long As He Needs Me [Lyrics]

Slipping through my Fingers - Mama Mia Lyrics

Love cannot dwell with suspicion _Cupid to Psyche

Psyche, the most beautiful woman on Earth, has angered one of the vengeful Roman goddess Venus. Venus, jealous and angry over competition for her beauty title, sets in motion the plan to destroy Psyche. Cupid, Venus' son, was put on the duty to do so, shooting her with an arrow so that when she awakes to a vile creature(placed by her side by Venus) she will fall in love with it, but something happened. While invisible and in Psyche's room, Psyche awakens before Cupid can scratch her with his arrow and startles him. Cupid scratches himself and falls deeply in love with her. He became enamored with the beautiful Psyche. Cupid became Psyche anonymous lover, which angers Venus. She curses Psyche that she will not meet her a suitable husband or any husband. This upsets Cupid, vowing to shoot any arrows, which will cause no creature to fall in love, mate or marry and in turn cause Venus' temple to fall to ruins. After months of this, Venus gives in to Cupid's desires for Psyche. Cupid goes back to work shooting his arrows, restoring everything as it should be. Every creature mates and fall in love and the Earth is becomes young.

Though as all this is happening, no one desires Psyche as their wife. Psyche's parents consult an oracle who tell them to leave Psyche on the nearest mountain, saying her beauty is so great it is not meant for mortal man. The West Wind comes and carries Psyche to a far away palace where she is attended by invisible servants until nightfall, where her promised bridegroom comes and consummates their marriage. Cupid visits her every night to sleep with her but demands that she never light any lamps. Psyche is convinced by her spiteful sisters that she has married a serpent who will devour her and her then unborn child at the right time. They tell her to conceal a knife and lamp so that once her husband is asleep she is to light the lamp and slay him. She does this. As she lights the lamp, Psyche sees not a serpent but the fair Cupid himself, however she accidentally pricks herself with one of his arrows and falls madly in love with him. She begins to kiss him but a drop of oil falls onto Cupid's shoulder and wakes him. He flies away quickly, leaving Psyche to fall from the palace, sick at heart.

Psyche searches for her love, even asking Venus for help. Venus decides to trick Psyche by sending her on dangerous and life-threatening quest, where she gets help from creatures to succeed. Venus is angered by this and decides to send Venus to the Underworld to as the Queen of the Underworld to give her a box with a bit of beauty in it, since Venus' beauty is waning from carrying for her distraught son, who is upset over Psyche's distrust.

Psyche thinks the quickest way to the Underworld is to kill herself by jumping off a tower. The tower stops her and tells her of a way to get into the underworld, get past Ceres(the three headed dog) and to return alive. She is to do as she told and not eat anything but coarse bread will there. She does this and returns to the Living World alive with the box but becomes curious and greedy. She opens the box to take some of the beauty but finds not beauty but sleep that engulf her.

Cupid, who has forgive Psyche, flies to her and awakes her with a kiss. He flies her to Mount Olympus, after begging Jupiter - king of the Gods - to help him. Psyche becomes immortal and stays forever with Cupid, giving birth to Delight, goddess of pleasure.

This is the story of Psyche and Cupid that is instilled in the sculpture by Antonio Canova. The story was told within the 4th, 5th, and 6th book of Apuleius' "The Golden Ass", the only Latin novel to survive in its entirety. A mix of an allegory, myth, and fairytale, Cupid and Psyche's love is one that has enamored the world for ages.

Created in 1796, this is the first of two statutes Canova sculpted of the couple. With his wings outstretched, Cupid is seen swooping down to his sleeping lover, Psyche. The focus of the sculpture is created by their interlocking arms and Cupid's loving gaze. The life-like feel of the sculpture similar to that of Bernini and Rodin. Canova's execution of Neo-Classical is an example of perfect form and finish. The flesh of Cupid and Psyche is almost real in the marble as Psyche reaches up to her love and gazes undying into his eyes.

CEMETERY

Time slowly, but definite, runs everyday wasting this soul

people come and go, seasons begin and end,

my hands reach out, and theres always a call that its never voiced

And still overwhelming, this silence, that darkness

do not let me breath

so pushed, forced, in trance

Im heading to that lasting place,

Oh I have waited so long

I had hoped for some hope, and I did what I should

I then one day, there was nothing that there was to do

So I closed its eyes

perfumed its body

sealed its mouth and dressed it remains

Nothing would take me, heal me, fill me

and loved as I once was

Only here hidden in words

I find solace and comfort and its never too cold...

but what it was... is nevermore

and although I refuse to

I should put this to rest

He will never come back

and I would never be his

Plain White T's - Rhythm of Love with Lyrics

Viva La Vida (Lyrics)

"Im selfish, impatient and a little insecure.
I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle.
But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best"

M Monroe

HABRA AUN ESPERANZA?

Cuando lo fuimos a ver con Rafa no esperábamos mucho. Habíamos hecho las averiguaciones del caso y realmente no había esperanza. De una forma u otra ya había sido condenado y lo que le esperaba era o la cárcel o continuar institucionalizado en el centro regional

Alli vimos doblados como en el vientre de su madre, hombres cansados de vivir; alli vimos caminar almas en pena con ojos desorbitados por el miedo. Que Dios nos ampare de un final asi!

Y llego Juan Gaspar, gordito y rellenito con esa humildad que solo el que sabe reconoce…. una barba que no cazaba con su gente, pero una mirada que revelaba todo. Ese dia ni hablo ni dijo mucho, sonrió eso si, con las preguntas de rigor que habrían de decirnos si era o no paisano nuestro. E indudablemente lo era.

No podia recordar mucho, asi que nos fuimos con las manos vacias. Pero quedo en nosotros su sonrisa y las palabras del interprete para la trabajadora social del centro:- "Recuerdate quien te enseño a montar bicicleta"-"Recuerate quien te enseno a nadar".

Cómo y en dónde pudo haber aprendido de la ninez si nunca fue nino!…como explicar esto a trabajadores que aunque intentan ayudar no conocen ni entienden ni podrian digerir el origen de los suenos por vivir y sobre quienes puede caer a veces la responsabilidad de un resultado fatal

Preocupada por saber si habia existido justicia, y si se habia dado el debido proceso pero al mismo tiempo rechazando el tema y sabiendo con mi propia sangre que puede ser muy cierto, quise hacer mi parte y busque ayuda. Si realmente habia habido o no abuso o intencion de abuso, era ya cuestion resuelta y sentenciada y quedaba entre Dios y el y quien le habia acusado.
Investigamos y con la ayuda del Dr Lebaron encontramos quine hablara es que seria probablemente su idioma maya

Asi que dos semanas despues le llevamos a Pedro Ixcoy de Cabrican quien hablaba Mam
Le explique a Pedro qué queria…qué era lo que necesitabamos. Alan, comos siempre callado y respetuoso, apoyandome y preocupandose por gente que no tiene ni pecas ni el cabello rojo como lo fue el de el un dia

Ante los 4 pares de ojos que observaban se dio el milagro. Llego, callado y aceptando… "lejano" quizas por tanta medicina y se sento. Le pregunte si me recordaba, no me puso ninguna atencion; le explique que necesitaba de nuevo que hiciera el esfuerzo por recordar; que para encontrar a sus padres y hacerles saber que estaba vivo necesitaba mas informacion, que habia traido a alguien que creia yo, hablaba su mismo idioma

Y Pedro se volvio hacia el y se dio el milagro. Al tiempo que las palabras extranas y entrecortadas brotaban de sus labios, la mirada del perdido se iba iluminando y la sonrisa con dientes manchados se iba haciendo sincera y ancha y en medio del asombro de unos y la emocion de todos se dio el milagro del entendimiento y se dio el milagro de la esperanza

De alli sali cargada de pesar por ese encierro, pero tambien de informacion valiosa para quizas poder cambiar un destino devastador

-Quó te dijo, Pedro, por que lo hizo?! "
Me dijo: "porque era lindo su pelo"


En un pais donde el absurdo baila con la histeria no solo en las noches sino tambien en el dia, un sencillo campesino estiro su mano para tocar un cabello dorado y reir en respuesta de una risa inocente y sin que entiendiese de donde venian, en un cerrar de ojos los jinetes del terror, del abuso, de la desconfianza y del racismo se lanzaron sobre el.

Y en ese instante recorde a Stephanie Pretz en Steps tomada del dedo de Don Juanito nuestro guardian y comprendo el abismo que la desconfianza y el asumir puede poner entre la justicia y la presuncion de inocencia

No pretendo dar lugar a quijotescas conclusiones porque la verdad no esta ya a nuestro alcance. Que habra habido detras? solo Dios sabe!, pero hasta donde yo he escuchado, aqui se sigue pregonando que nadie es culpable hasta que se demuestre lo contrario y Juan perdido en el laberinto de no entender que sucedia, se perdió en la negacion y en su incomprension fue testigo mudo de la firma sin tinta de una sentencia de tortura perpetua que nunca tuvo un debido proceso

Si. En un mundo donde se vende a raudales y a precio de nada lo mas sucio y bajo del ser humano, donde la inocencia es mancillada casi al mismo tiempo que se corta el cordon umbilical, donde se habla de suenos y donde se cortan de raz esperanzas e ideales, donde se lucha aun por lo que fue y donde se pierde lo que pudo ser, donde un ser lastimado de muerte busca escape y es abrumado con imposibles mientras se ofrece una mentira a cambio de experimentar, donde la gente muere por dentro porque no cazo en el sistema ni supo bailarle al mismo; donde se pregunta a un nino si se puede confiar en quien le dio la vida y donde luego se olvida que aun tiene un alma que necesita de guia…en un mundo cabal , estricto y ordenando donde se yerguen mil dedos senalando y se hace una justicia subjetiva y conveniente y donde luego todos orgullosos y ufanos se van a comer sus hamburguesas y a dar gracias a Dios antes del primer bocado.
Si. En un mundo que no tiene fronteras ni limites reales porque todos coinciden en que sea permitido, en un mundo asi duermen los pedros que queriendo alcanzar un sueno , despertaron un dia en medio de un infierno.

Y sin embargo, una semana despues escucho a la esperanza hablar de nuevo y todo vuelve a brillar. Pedro, moviendose entre la red maravillosa que aun mantienen, ha encontrado a su familia quien lo daba por muerto en los Corrales!
Imposible describir con palabras el encuentro de todos con la esperanza…l importante es que se dio y que no importa entonces tanto lo que vemos cada dia si a los que nos importa hacemos lo que debemos por estirar la mano y tocar corazones

Beatriz Illescas
Consul de Guatemala en Atlanta

September 13

Its your day and Im not there
close to you
as once you would have liked
I wonder if there is
a new joy or a new hope
and maybe still some memories
that keep on coming afloat

Its your day and theres no calling…
theres not she, theres no us
and I, unreachable as I could ever be
wish I could hold you
as I use to do so
and wish there was something
still good between us

But I grew as a stranger,
you became an enemy
and for the first time in life
if I see one more time
the one I loved once
I will walk pass behind him
and would never smile back

IF WE

If we could have said good bye at least to the other
if we, instead of this long agony of hurting the other
and expecting what it cannot be
if we instead of deceiving had said
I love you but it cannot be
if we hadnt had so many expectations
and hadnt failed so badly and so low
If we hadnt expected if we hadnt believed
that there be no other
that we were the one
perhaps we still had
perhaps we could have
some chance for some peace
and some chance for some hope

A-ha - Take On Me (Official Music video)

NEGATIVES

Some days I see myself
and what encloses me
as negatives of pictures
of what I used to be
Everything looks darker

and what is left of me
seems like dim abstractions
that poorly resembles
what I feel I was


And the dark tones seem to consume

the light shining of what still is,

and as life and days pass by

the white ghosts of what remains

gaze from the negatives at me
with sorrowed eyes and puzzled looks 

that keep me from ignoring
that everything has changed



And to start a new day feels so daunting
so wasted, so vague;

a long lasting misery
from which I can’t escape.

So I long for the nights

where my dreams- softly summoned-
might come here to paint gentle colors
in this colorless life

So today this souls keeps undeveloped pictures
of what we were once and of what be could’ve been
and this world seems so futile, so empty, so gray
when I know that is over, when I feel there’s no you

Cuando volvemos, los que la amamos aun y los que la llevamos en la sangre, nos inclinamos sobre la ventanilla para bebernos con la mirada sus parcelitas trabajadas, sus montes desnudos , sus colinas aun verdes, su cielo tan celeste. Y mientras vemos el corazon se aprieta por los que aun trabajan esa tierra, por los que aun suenan por justicia, por los que aun esperan el manana. Por los que en su pequeno lugar cumplen, por los que se quedaron, por lo que siguen dandole su colorido

El corazon se aprieta y se ensancha por sus rios suaves, por sus cimas pelonas, por las sonrisas sin dientes, por las barriguitas hinchadas, por las miradas perdidas, por sus lagos de ensueno, por sus selvas de misterio, por sus cuentos de ensueno, por la riqueza que guarda…

Quizas alguno alli al lado nuestro, ocupado en sumas y talvez tambien en restas, no recuerda el haberla sentido alguna vez , no recuerda el haberse detenido, no recuerda el haberse conmovido, no recuerda el haber sonado enmiendas…pero los que si, los que aun lo hacemos, los que aun sonamos, lo que aun la sentimos, esos somos de los que aun se espera que no olvidemos " hacer patria"

We killed it and now its time to bury it; time to hide for good any evidence or reminder of our crime so our souls might kept a little peace for the rest of the journey.

We had something precious and vulnerable, we were given a gift but we-with no pity or mercy- with no plan nor pondering possible consequences-, destroyed it

We killed it and we both know it. There is no going back, no forgiveness nor amendments to do. Nothing that could be possible cleaned or corrected.

No tender farewells no hope for someday

We have to hurry and complete the act. This was a murder and we were found guilty; no need to defend ourselves in front of anybody because no one but us expected justice…

Yes we were found guilty with no penalties, fees , bails or condemnation rather than memories everywhere. Scents, visions, sounds, music, presences, promises, possibilities, gestures, laughter, tears, words always present till the end of time

So before it stench gets impregnated in our breath and in our skins…lets get on with it for our sakes and bury the remains of what was once our dream...

Entangled in my dreams
diffused on my skin
elusive as the morning haze in the forest
yet oppressive as those nights
that surround those who are lost

I cannot erase you from my soul
nor from my memories nor from my dreams
and every night, intangible yet so present
you still close your eyes over my pillows
you still rest your body upon my arms

and when I walk there's an invisible shadow
-dress with memories that cannot be evade-
that speaks softly to my inner desires
whispering that you are still here
walking behind me, holding me still

Knotted to what has been left
held by what I need to hold
your voice sings into my present
and you sights echo
those seized by my heart

But you are not here
and there is no calling
and like a river that flows errant
to be merged inevitable into the sea
my life runs out second by second
dying of hunger and drying by thirst
for that love that once was promised
but never kept to be fulfilled

If I may

Now it is I the one listening to the silence of the night

And its breathtaking soft whispers calling

trying to understand what those calls mean now

It seems I know them though I dont know if they are safe

I want to open the door, I want to go out and dance their music

I want myself to feel involved by their soft breeze

I want to reach and learn from the mysterious

From that silence, from that gaps

but there's this fear unknown and strange

that holds me

I stand by the door hesitating

I have turned the bolts off

And Im letting the shadows come into light...

tilting a little over dim dunes

spelled by their quiet promises,

but held by the clarity of that back light

that withholds our pasts

yet wanting so much to dive into that mist

I wonder if the pale moon shadow that I perceive out there

would be enough to guide me through perhaps uneven paths?

"Beware of pride. Recent findings have shown that, besides increasing stupidity, it produces huge fat deposits around the abdominal area, severe heartache and irreversible brain damage"

Anoche tocaron a la puerta

estando yo sola creí que regresabas;

corrí entonces a abrirla, llenándome de risa

me estire el vestido, me acomode el cabello

y no sabiendo que decirte

otra vez te abri mi puerta!

Esperaba encontrarte más viejo y más difícil

esperaba suavizarte con esta mi sonrisa

esperaba que me amaras y me hicieras de nuevo

esperaba tus palabras y también tus caricias

esperaba en fin, que vinieras a llevarme!

No encontré en el umbral a quien tanto he amado

encontré una mano que estirando pedia

encontré una sonrisa que brillando esperaba

encontré unas voces que nada me decian

me encontré con la ausencia de lo que hubo un dia.

Y al cerrar la puerta regrese a mis vacíos

me acomodé despacio, sonreí derrotada

y me senté a esperar sonandote en silencio

Cada noche callada te dejo ante tu puerta

las flores de mi amor y de la esperanza mia

y cada nuevo dia que regreso a encontrarte

vislumbro los restos de lo que yo he dejado

olvidados y mustios en el umbral de tu alma

Tocar la puerta y preguntar por ti ha sido en vano,

estirar mi mano y perderme en tu cuerpo ha sido ingenuo,

pedirte que me ames y que me acompanes ha sido absurdo,

sonar con un encuentro ha sido triste,

y esperar a que vengas ha sido lastimoso

Asi que el dia de hoy mi dignidad recojo,

remiendo sus restos y empapo sus bordes

y sobre los hombros como chal parchado,

sabiendo que habra frio me lo echo acongojada

La amargura me invade y te siento tan lejano

como si nunca nunca hubieses existido

como si nunca nunca nos hubiésemos amado

como si nunca nunca hubiésemos sonado

y lamento lo perdido pero aun mas lo vivido

y como anciana doblada por el peso de un vacio

encorvada y vencida sin darte mas las gracias

me volteo y me alejo en busca del olvido!

B illescas

seis de mayo

"El beso mas difícil no es el primero,
sino el último"

2 anos despues
En la noche oscura lanza su llamado y el responde callado seguro de su amor.
Llega y la envuelve y quitandole todo la contempla adorándola; la besa completa, la dobla, la ama, la odia, la eleva y doblega; la lleva cerca, la recorre toda, la llora, la rie, la cansa, la duerme, la llena de el; la recorre de nuevo.
No dice mas nada, porque "no es necesario".
Y al llegar con la luz la realidad eterna, inquieto la abandona pues no es mas ya esa noche.
Y ella en silencio emprende su camino, se aleja errante y comprende lo perdido, vislumbra su sentido, realiza su lugar y entiende que ya es tarde...
Y esa otra pasion que el muy bien ya conoce, inunda, lastima, sofoca, enardece y en un último intento por alcanzar su alma, con un grito callado, le suplica su beso.

diez de mayo

Hubo, como siempre ha habido, muchos intentos previos; unos jóvenes y otros vacíos. Ella sin duda no sabia diferenciar entre unos y otros porque uno sabe hasta que lo encuentra y tiene entonces como comparar aun aquello que no ha de tener nunca comparación alguna.

Porque puede uno encontrar por primera vez en el mar un trocito de madreperla y creer que tiene un pedazo de cielo entre leas manos hasta que se encuentra un diamante y ve que hay estrellas también en la tierra.
Porque puede uno sentir la brisa de la tarde pero comprender la frescura hasta que la brisa del mar alborota tu pelo.
Porque puede uno conocer la fatiga y descansar tranquilo cuando la noche se acerca, pero jamás como se duerme en una tarde de sábado entre los brazos y el respirar profundo de aquel que te bien ama.
Porque puede uno caminar por el sendero hasta que se aprende a ir danzando con la música, - porque se puede existir aunque no se viva, pero no se puede existir toda vez que se ha vivido….-

Asi que llego el día en que habría de saberlo. Quizás le habría llevado media vida, pero el resto que le quedaría, lo llevaría plasmado en sus labios como si fuese una constante y no la variable que paso a ser

Sin esperarlo permitió el instante…y desde ese entonces fue como si todo lo doblado se desdoblase en mil abanicos; todo lo contenido, se desbordase en un sin fin de cascadas; todo lo sonado, se abriese como flor que se abre al verano; todo lo que le hubiese endurecido, se deslizase ajeno como gotas de lluvia que resbalan en las hojas después de la tormenta; como si todo lo que le hubiese oscurecido, se disolviese por luz que se cuela en la rendija de una puerta.

Le tomo por sorpresa pero muy suavemente, y ella, resignada, se rindió entre sus brazos
Y una noche de final de primavera, iniciando el principio del otoño de su vida, sin que esa noche se diese mas nada que ese encuentro, abriendo sus labios, respondió a su beso

B Illescas

Time To Say Goodbye - Sarah Brightman

You never went away

although you wanted to leave

your essence remained here

captured by my love

While my despair drifted you away

and our pride held us aside

you stayed here inside me

you did never depart

You remain in myself

entangled in my dreams,

you remain in the music,

and in the wind on the trees

You remain in the sound of the rain when it falls,

in the whispers of the night, in the things that I share

in the sun rays of afternoons, in the softness of sights

and in the smile that your memory has brought to my life..

You still hold all my soul

you still have all my thoughts

your have never betrayed us

you remained here with me!

B Illescas

Ah! The cleverness of me!
Peter Pan

ALEACION PERFECTA

Tenían todo. El metal precioso, la temperatura adecuada, el deseo de crear, el tiempo para hacerlo y la felicidad que causa la posibilidad...

Se combinó todo con el proposito ferviente de lograrlo. Quizás el catalizador equivocado fue aquello que disparo el resultado.
A la fecha no se sabe qué sirvió como catalizador. Erosiones antiguas de estaciones pasadas? Presiones inadecuadas sobre la temperatura? Desconocimiento del químico preciso y exacto?, calculo erroneo del momento idoneo?, una formula mal combinada? Un idioma ajeno? la cantidad perfecta de fuego y agua para lograr la aleación?
No sabemos... pero a partir de alli, despues del fracaso, el mundo entero quedo en la penumbra...

Nada fue destruido, los elementos claves aun perduran y embargo... lo que prometia ser tanto, se quedó en la memoria de los que aun recuerdan la posibilidad de lo imposible y, que teniendolo todo, no saben que mas pueden hacer...

On Charles -"The Composer" trying to picture my "mysterious" work

"I see an office scene that's sort of a carnival version of the 3/4 size floor in Being John Malkovich.

Ceilings that are only about 6 feet above the floor; which itself has an intoxicated cant of about 22 degrees...Tables and chairs move; sliding slowly, seemingly at random intervals throughout the day. It is almost as if the office was adrift and listing. First to port, then, slowly, agonizingly, righting itself for a moment of feigned balance, and then, seemingly rethinking the whole affair, giving in to the inevitable pull towards starboard. Listening intently, and if one could find a moment of repose amongst amidst the cacophony of the machinery coming from just beyond the next door, it seems possible that one can make out the distant sounds of rushing water; the popping of rivets amidst the crumpling of bulkheads...

There is a centrally located main office, that is undefined in size, yet giving the impression of being possibly several football fields in area....

An endless sense of movement; of beehive-like activity pervades, yet it is diffuse, unfocused, almost as if knowledge had just arrived of the next world, but there are no words for it; nor is it possible to summon an image of it; a sense of running in circles while becoming gradually aware that there is no such thing as geometry....

A low hum, close to 60 cycles, provides an undefined aural glue, a mechanized stickiness, if you will, which somehow performs a function akin to gravity. There is a subliminal sense that if the hum were to stop, even for a moment, the furniture and the occupants of the space would begin to float away from their assigned areas. Pencils and paperclips would be catapulted into lazy trajectories by interrupted thoughts and half-formed words...

In and out of these rooms go an endless stream of runners. Infinite in their variety of size and color. An orange midget does cartwheels down the middle of a room, a path opening in front of him mysteriously amidst the crush of p.c.s, shredding machines, and modular cubicle components. Then, just as mysteriously, closing back up behind him as he moves quickly away, receding into the distance, becoming smaller and smaller, until he is just a pinpoint, one dot among others; indistinguishable.He is followed in the next moment by a woman on stilts, careening from side to side as she dodges paper airplanes and delivers international magazines with one modification, which is that all of the Ps are missing...


Of course, that was one image.


The other that I entertained for a moment and then just as quickly discarded was so:

I see a room full of various people, all wearing 1962 vintage B-52 bomber headsets, a la Dr. Strangelove*, ashtrays overflowing with cigarette butts and lipstick smudged coffee cups crowding the tabletops. Suddenly the door swings open and brandishing a riding crop, you stride to the middle of the room, climb up onto a chair and speaking nearly perfect German with a clipped accent, you bark, " Nur darf ich stream of consciousness-Technik als Schrift verwenden! Verstehst du?"

* * * * * * * * * *




*I read that when Stanley Kubrick filmed Dr. Strangelove, he didn't tell Slim Pickens that it was a comedy. So whenever I watch it, I imagine Slim taking his role seriously....

Dark clouds

Life cannot be taken as a game and we should not act like players. Maybe if we refuse to see life as what it is, then maybe we can choose to take it as the game that will be played again and again and again until the last voice is heard. But why not then better choose to be dancers that follow the music that passion brings and maybe just maybe we will actually live

Or- if we are fools- maybe we should choose to be spectators so after enjoying the show we can get up and leave the place...or maybe, actually we could choose to be the stars of our own stage so while we live we could shine in such a manner that when we leave people will always want to come back to see us.

Perhaps we should never choose to be observers to learn from distance so that when we get another chance, if we get another, we wont be making the mistakes that are so devastating. If we stay there, the truth is that we wont get another chance and what are we doing there then?

Or better perhaps even better if we are cowards, to choose to be asleep in some senses forgetting where life really is and instead choose to live simply to "exist" when awake. Ultimately, while you sleep, life is just passing by, every single unrepeatable second, just passing by

But never a game, and never players

And love... love cannot be a joke nor something that can be diminished or forgotten or dishonored when it enters your house. Love should be cherished like sunset, held like a bird, nourished like an infant, protected like glass, worshiped as the unique thing that takes us closer to God

But when we choose to be players and smilingly mock what love has given us, and foolishly believe that life is just ahead, and love is just another chance, the glimpses of true joy that sparkled our lives, turn into a dark, dense cloud, and the essence of that joy, free for better,flies away to never come back

Beatriz

Que viva Argentina, Espana, La Naranja Mecanica (enojada entre el carro!) y La Squadra Azurri!!!! Julio 3 2010-un dia antes de irse para Guate

Hispanic Chamber Consular Ball June 2010

Summer, Summerina, Sumber , Sumerinina Monina a los 5 meses

CASO

A un cruzado caballero,

garrido y noble garzón,
en el palenque guerrero,
le clavaron un acero
tan cerca del corazón,
que el físico al contemplarle,
tras verle y examinarle, dijo:
«Quedará sin vida
si se pretende sacarle
el venablo de la herida».
Por el dolor congojado,
triste, débil, desangrado,
después que tanto sufrió,
con el acero clavado el caballero murió.
Pues el físico decía que, en dicho caso,
quien una herida tal tenía,
con el venablo moría, sin el venablo también.
¿No comprendes, Asunción,
la historia que te he contado,
la del garrido garzón
con el acero clavado muy cerca del corazón?
Pues el caso es verdadero;
yo soy el herido, ingrata,
y tu amor es el acero:
¡si me lo quitas, me muero;
si me lo dejas, me mata!

Ruben Dario

. ¡PUELLA MEA!

Muchachita mía,
gloria y ufanía
de mi atardecer,
yo sólo tenía
la santa alegría
de mi poesía y de tu querer.

¿Por qué te partiste?
¿Por qué te me fuiste?
Mira que estoy triste,
triste, triste, triste,
con tristeza tal
que mi cara mustia
deja ver mi angustia
como si fuera de cristal.

Muchachita mía,
¡qué sola, qué fría
te fuiste aquel día!
¿En qué estrella estás?
¿En qué espacio vuelas?
¿En qué mar rielas?
¿Cuándo volverás?
—¡Nunca, nunca más!

Marzo de 1912
Amado Nervo

. To place securely; make stable or firm: fixed the tent poles in the ground. See Synonyms at fasten.
b. To secure to another; attach: fixing the notice to the board with tacks.
2.
a. To put into a stable or unalterable form: tried to fix the conversation in her memory.
b. To make (a chemical substance) nonvolatile or solid.
c. Biology To convert (nitrogen) into stable, biologically assimilable compounds.
d. To kill and preserve (a specimen) intact for microscopic study.
e. To prevent discoloration of (a photographic image) by washing or coating with a chemical preservative.
3. To direct steadily: fixed her eyes on the road ahead.
4. To capture or hold: The man with the long beard fixed our attention.
5.
a. To set or place definitely; establish: fixed her residence in a coastal village.
b. To determine with accuracy; ascertain: fixed the date of the ancient artifacts.
c. To agree on; arrange: fix a time to meet.
6. To assign; attribute: fixing the blame.
7.
a. To correct or set right; adjust: fix a misspelling; fix the out-of-date accounts.
b. To restore to proper condition or working order; repair: fix a broken machine.
c. Computer Science To convert (data) from floating-point notation to fixed-point notation.
8. To make ready; prepare: fixed the room for the guests; fix lunch for the kids; fixed himself a milkshake.
9. To spay or castrate (an animal).
10. Informal To take revenge upon; get even with.
11. To influence the outcome or actions of by improper or unlawful means: fix a prizefight; fix a jury.
v.intr.
1. To direct one's efforts or attention; concentrate: We fixed on the immediate goal.
2. To become stable or firm; harden: Fresh plaster will fix in a few hours.
3. Chiefly Southern U.S. To be on the verge of; to be making preparations for. Used in progressive tenses with the infinitive: We were fixing to leave without you.
n.
1.
a. The act of adjusting, correcting, or repairing.
b. Informal Something that repairs or restores; a solution: no easy fix for an intractable problem.
2. The position, as of a ship or aircraft, determined by visual observations with the aid of equipment.
3. A clear determination or understanding: a briefing that gave us a fix on the current situation.
4. An instance of arranging a special consideration, such as an exemption from a requirement, or an improper or illegal outcome, especially by means of bribery.
5. A difficult or embarrassing situation; a predicament. See Synonyms at predicament.
6. Slang An amount or dose of something craved, especially an intravenous injection of a narcotic.Phrasal Verb:
fix up
1. To improve the appearance or condition of; refurbish.
2. To provide; equip.
3. Informal To provide a companion on a date for: fixed me up with an escort at the last minute.Idiom:
fix (someone's) wagon
To get revenge on another.
[Middle English fixen, from fix, fixed in position, from Latin fxus, past participle of fgere, to fasten; see dhgw- in Indo-European roots.]
fixa·ble adj.
Regional Note: Fixing to ranks with y'all as one of the best known markers of Southern dialects, although it occasionally appears in the informal speech and writing of non-Southerners as well. Fixing to means "to be on the verge of or in preparation for (doing a given thing)," but like the modal auxiliaries, it has only a single invariant form and is not fully inflected like other verbs. Its form is always the present participle followed by the infinitive marker to: They were fixing to leave without me. Semantically, fixing to can refer only to events that immediately follow the speaker's point of reference. One cannot say, "We're fix

DEFINITIONS

TO FIX

1. What you find in written:
To place securely; make stable or firm. To secure to another; attach. To put into a stable or unalterable form. To give a permanent or final form. To capture or hold. To set or place definitely. To determine with accuracy. To agree on.To correct or set right. To restore to proper condition or working order.

2.What its "fixed" in my mind after reading it :
Stable, permanent, agreeness, to set right, to restore to its proper condition"

3. What you find in my heart that restores what you need: healing, commitment, respect, and devotion.

4. What it is and always has been in my soul:

If one has tenderness, one can heal almost everything;
if one is made of steel, one can set right that which has been bent;
if one has understanding to agree, one can hold when its needed;
if one has humility, one can restore what has been injured;
if one has strenght, one can determine comittment;
if one has devotion one can build permanence;
if one has love enough... one can fix everything...

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love.

But the greates of these is love"

Corinthias 13

Who are you?

Should it be fair enough saying

that you are as simply

as one more of the flock ?

a regrettable flaw

my most poignant mistake

an uncertain experience,

a remarkable grief

and the one that has failed me

the worst and the best?

Who are you, who are you?

not the one that had lost me

nor the one that I need

not the one who is waited,

not the smile on my face

Not the one that is there

not the one who supports

Who are you, who are you!?

not the one that holds dear

nor the one who just cares

not the one who complies

or the one that sustains

you are sin, you are poison,

you are treason, you are death...

you are regret, you are sadness

you are void, a letdown

you are hollow, you are selfish

you are dreadful, and poignant

the theft that has stolen

my joy and my peace

You are nothing my darling

but a wrong to forget

B

"If someone is supposing something dreadful might happen

( a tree falling down, a string pulley breaking)

simply suppose that it wont and everyone ends up happier"

Winnie -the- Pooh